This morning I am up before anyone else. Well I guess My Love is out for a morning run while it is still dark and all I hear are the coffee pot brewing and the Lord speaking to my heart. As I wake up this new day I am excited and anxious about the next chapter. I know that God has big plans for us. Plans that he has been preparing possibly for the entire 8 years of our marriage. For the past several months, the Lord has been watering seeds in me so that I would be ready to bloom where he planted me in the next season.
As I open up my God Calling today, the words jump off the page as exactly what I am thinking.
"I love to pour My blessings down in rich, in choicest measure. But like the seed sowing-- the ground must be prepared before the seed is dropped. Yours to prepare the soil-- Mine to drop the seed-blessing into the prepared soil. Together we share in, and joy in, the harvest. Spend more time in soil-preparing. Prayer fertilizes soil. There is much to do in preparation."
If at the beginning of our marriage eight years ago, the Lord told me that one day he would be blessing us with a new house to be used for his glory I would have denied his gift. I would have argued something like this..."Thanks anyway Lord but this plain girl doesn't need nice things. Having people over (especially last minute...gasp) makes me anxious because my house isn't clean enough and the food isn't nice enough. Use someone else Lord. I'm not ready yet." I am thankful he doesn't tell us his plans long in advance. He cultivates our willing hearts and then he reveals his purpose for our very lives when we are ready.
When we got the news that the second offer on house #2 was not accepted I praised God with all joy. I am pretty sure our house guest thinks I am crazy. I mean, aren't most people upset in situations like this? But honestly, the process became much more important than the answer. When the door closed, my Love and I knew exactly what we were supposed to pursue. And just because the space seemed more than enough and the mortgage would be at the top of our budget, we had to come to this place in the process (me surrendering to God's will and letting my husband make the hard decisions) before we were able to trust God with the details regarding how it would be used for his glory. He has clearly planted something in the heart of my husband. If I am honest, I can see how it was there eight years ago and the Lord knew I wasn't ready yet. I was too prideful to make myself 100% available to be used by my Creator however he pleased. And as is usually like Him, he chose to use me in my weakness.
"I will be giving you more than enough. It will make you uncomfortable at first, but you will learn to love it. And because I know your heart, how much better for Me to get the glory for what you have not asked for."
OK Lord. I am willing.
After the offer we put on the first home was ignored, I told my Love confidently that it was our house and we should just keep looking at other homes in the meantime. The seller would most definitely come to her senses and call us up. I sure was surprised when they took the house off the market a week later. I knew God had better plans. Plans to trust him in everything. We pursued a house that made more financial sense (twice) and God said that door is closed (twice).
So today we look forward to opening a new door, literally. My Love is taking a deposit check to a new build community today. The same floor plan to house number one that we offered on only better. More available, usable space to be used for God's glory. I am excited and anxious and out of my comfort zone. But through this process I am more confident than ever that the plans God has for us in the next chapter have be carefully cultivated and watered to bring us to this exact moment.
Use us Lord for your glory.
What is next? Spending more time preparing the soil in prayer. There is much to prepare.