Monday, June 18, 2012

heart work in marriage

God has us in such sweet season right now.  One in which He is teaching us to depend solely on Him.  He has been showing us for awhile that we haven't really been going about this whole marriage thing the right way.  I mean, we had good motives.  We just weren't doing the hard work to make our marriage really shine for Jesus.  God has been particularly showing this to me lately probably because I grip so tightly to the way I think things should be.  It is time to peel back the fingers and give it to God.  I am working through Judy Rossi's book with our women's Bible study called Enhancing Your Marriage.  It is going to be a good one.

During nine years of marriage we have learned a thing or two.  After 3 1/2 years together before our wedding day, I felt like we were prepared for marriage.  We had been through the whole first year of our relationship without so much as a disagreement.  Then we survived the second year where we seemingly bickered about everything.  The third year we spent geographically separated.  We knew each other well and were ready to spend the rest of our lives together.  

Well lets just say courting and marriage are two different things.  I am pretty sure that My Love asked himself more than once, "What did I get myself into?" while we traipsed around Italy for our honeymoon during the hottest summer ever recorded.  Even though we had a long relationship before getting married, there was still more to learn about My Love and our growing relationship.  In the beginning, our problems were mostly surface issues.  Today we have come to realize that nine years later any problems boil down to matters of the heart.  What have I not fully surrendered to God inside my marriage?  At this point, we both know what that answers are individually (and they are different), it is just a matter of doing it.  Of dying to self daily and choosing to trust that God has a perfect design for our marriage that we are only halfway getting done on our own.  I hear him sweetly calling me to give up more.  To open my hands and submit to my Shepherd completely regarding the most important human relationship in my life.  Even though I know that there is still more work to be done in me, I call this season sweet because I know only fruitful growth will come out of it.  How could I possibly be anxious about that?  Any hard heart work is worth doing if it draws me closer to my Father.  Nine years of marriage to my best friend.  I am so thankful for the husband and Daddy to our kids God gave to me.  Pray for us.

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